S4E46 It is easy to attract men!

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Transcript

Speaker 1 (0s): Hi, bows and bow ties. So look, I had a conversation, maybe it was a week or two ago. We were talking about men who go to I was outside of practice. Actually, I was talking to men who don't look like me. It was a brief conversation and we started laughing about, in general, like men and women dating and like, I don't know, like we're all married to middle aged. And I made the comment about men who go to these areas where, you know, look, men who leave the United States and go to places like me, or like I cannot pronounce it in Columbia, the, the Dominican Republic, et cetera.

I said it, I said, they don't have to do that. I said, it's hard to explain. It was multiple things that were happening in the conversation. It was a really short conversation. The point I'm making is there's like men who go to these places, there's like a true imbalance of resources, right? And so I said, when they see these men coming there, these women are professional. you know, what's And? they, they're like the mod. It's a, like, these men are lick. And I made them laugh because I said, you know, when I was single, I, I learned from other women and stuff, but, but it wasn't like something that was explicit.

It was something that you learned through heuristics, right? And I learned that like when talking to men, like these could be guys that I genuinely liked, but I learned, you know what? I made my husband laugh too. He was like, he hawed because, you know, he sees the shenanigans too when we were talking about that type of thing. but I said, it is so easy to get a man. And now, and now when I, I hate saying get a man, like, like this is like the, the penultimate, right?

But if we're talking about the goal of gaining a boyfriend or a husband or whatever, I said, it's, it's easy. And I said, all you do is you speak to their insecurities. You, you speak to their ego. That's it. And it doesn't have to be like, outrageous. This is why I do not like taking this road at this time. Like, see, that was my fault for taking some extra time to sleep in.

And now it is 6 42 in the morning and I'm sitting here crawling to the exit. I'm, I'm not a fan of this. This is, I'm, I'm not happy. Anyway, I digress. So, you know, I said, what you do is you speak to their ego. And so like when you, if you're listening to a man, especially one who has to travel to do those kind of things to find women, right? I said, what you do is you listen at first you know what they value. And then you start saying things like, you know what? And you don't have to say, you make me feel safe, but you say things that give the impression of them providing safety or them being so smart.

And you don't have to say, you are so smart. It starts off with like, wow. Now look, I've had to do this before when like one time I was trolling a guy, right? Like he was trying to, he I think, he thought he was schooling me on something. This was years ago. He was trying to school me on something and he didn't realize I was way more experienced than he was. I forgot what it was. Travels and I don't know. And the guy, what I'm making was, it's like it starts off with something along the lines of, wow, you know, that, that, that's really interesting.

you know, I didn't think of that. And you don't say a whole lot, you just smile. You're like, you know what? I can see that you're thinking person. So what you're doing is, you know, if you are just having fun or whatever like that, you're just playing into the ego. If you are living, if I were living in Columbia or someplace like that, you know, I'd be more along the lines of, you know, if those American women don't know how to treat you like a man, and you know, I would never do that to you.

And you know what? You are so smart and I love how you take care of your family and all these are the things, right? Because that's all what the talking points are. I said, you speak to their ego. I said, it's the easiest thing. And men eat it up. Eat it up. I mean, I've seen it time and time again, you just speak to their ego. If it's, if it's all about their, they're like really into like being in shape, you just make some casual comments like, man, I can tell that you are really in good shape.

Or like, it's your, all your hard work in the gym is paying off. You don't have to tell them they look good, right? It's, it's the subtleties behind it. It's so easy. And what happens is you're constantly like in their head, And, they remember how they felt when they were around you. I'm like, But. anyway, I said, it's so easy. I'm like, if you're into trying to be like this big back dude and you're just a provider and everything like that, I'd be like, oh my goodness. Now I'm exaggerating. but I speak to everything that would speak to insecurities. I feel really safe when I'm around you.

you know what? I feel really protected. I don't want to go in there without you. I don't wanna go anywhere near this area. Can you come with me? Will you come with me? Like, it's so easy. Or it's just the little things like I think, oh, I do remember one conversation, and this is a good example, was this guy, I remember I was in my twenties and I was sitting at happy hour. And I went with a group of guys, it was like a group of us. We went to happy hour and I had like these guy friends, they were out trying to meet ladies or whatever, but I was sitting at the bar, And, they would always come check on me, right?

I'm like, just go. And I was sitting at the bar and this guy, I was maybe I was I 26, maybe, maybe 26, 27, 26, something like that. And this guy came up to the bar. He sat down and he starts running down his resume. And he told me how, you know, he just is this adventurous guy and he likes to travel and that he could change my life.

And he said, you know, at this point I'm sitting here at the bar and I didn't even say anything. 'cause I'm sitting here thinking like, and he's like, you know, you should consider traveling. And like, he just made a whole bunch of assumptions about me not realizing that I had probably been around the world like a million times more than he ever would be. But what I did was, when the guy was talking, at first, I didn't say anything because he was telling me about how he's well traveled. And he was like, I've been to Miami, got to Jamaica. And he was saying these things.

I'm like, so I didn't wanna embarrass the guy. And I was just like, oh, did you have a good time? And you know, you're just letting him talk and you're just like, yeah, that's amazing that you had an opportunity to travel to these places. And I'm just sitting here like, this guy's a full on clown. And the point I'm getting at was, I just, just let him talk. You'll find out people telling themselves, right? And the boy started talking and I'm just lit. I'm just like, oh, well I'm glad you had a great time in Miami.

How did you like Jamaica and how did you like this? Whatever. And then he finally, when he finally asked me like, so have you been anywhere? I'm like, yeah. He's like, well, well, where have you been? And I started listening on some of places. He's like, so basically I look real stupid right now, or something like that. I was like, well, I, I, I don't know if I would say that, but gimme back to it. I'm like, all this stuff that these guys are talking about on these podcasts and everything like that, I just laugh because I'm like, these are these guys who are just like so out there and so wanna be hyper masculine.

Those are the easiest ones, the easiest ones to get because that's all they think about. And all you have to do is speak to the insecurities. Anyway, I took them through that out there, and I probably didn't do a good job of explaining myself, but I just wanted to say it. It, these are he horrible moments. He haw, you know, because if you speak to their insecurities or you can tell the things that they value. If it's having a strong body and it's kinda like, oh, you must go here to gym, are you?

Then it's like, oh, so you're naturally built like that, you know? It's so easy. I'm just kinda like, that's the reason why like when I, when, well, I don't listen to these guys, but you'll see clips occasionally the people who are out here on these stupid podcasts. I'm just, and it's so embarrassing. I'm like, oh my goodness. It's just too easy. It's just so easy. But. anyway, that's pretty much it. I said what I said, y'all go be mad and argue with yourself. all right. Bye.

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