Black Opinionated Woman

S4E119 Protective hairstyles, Shannon Sharpe

• Black Opinionated Woman • Season 4 • Episode 119

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Speaker 1 (0s): You know, I was going to hop on here singing rain, but, but I figured I would spare you guys the bleeding of your ears. So if you didn't know, the East Coast is experiencing a lot of rain. you know, hurricane is hurricane, right? Hurricane Halene or Helena, what's the name of this hurricane? I know I, just call it the hurricane. Now, I don't live in, well, technically I'm south of the Mason Dixon in Maryland, but I don't live in the south South, so I'm not experiencing the level of devastation that they're experiencing, right?

We're just getting a lot of rain. I say this because, and I have a point to all of this yammering. I, last week, I, I had plans to get my hamper, especially that I hadn't had it done in a long time. you know, I was going to do some things, but the weather was weathering. And case, you know, as a fullon black woman, the hair does not like to co cooperate with all that moisture. I mean, it's, moisture is good for your hair, but if you wanna maintain some sort of style, right?

It's, it's not the, the, the hair is not going to cooperate. So at the last second, I decided to put braids in my hair. Yes, I do my own, but of course they don't look like super professional. but I don't care. I put braids in my hair because I had a wedding to attend this weekend. So I'm like, you know what? It'll be a cute little protective style for a few weeks, you know? And then we will move on from this hairstyle. So it got me thinking about Protective hairstyles. 'cause while I had been braiding my hair, I had watched something on TikTok before I went back to watching a YouTube video while I was throwing my hair and watching sports and stuff.

And someone had mentioned, and it was something I had actually talked about before, what are you protecting your hair from? Now, for those of you who are new to my channel, I am the Black Opinionated Woman, also known as a B. So I talk about whatever I wanna talk about. you know why? Because it's my channel. I like to focus on things that are gonna be more targeted for a black woman, but it doesn't necessarily mean that's the case. And then I'm gonna talk about Shannon Sharpe in a second. but I wanna talk about the protective hairstyle situation for a second.

I'm glad that that topic has resurfaced. Now, granted, I want to point out my hypocrisy right away. As I talk about people who wear these Protective hairstyles, as you see, my hair is braided. So, but what I will also say is, before I get into this conversation, make sure you go ahead and like this video, and it's described because I'm amazing in every way.

You can practically do no wrong. all right? Now look, I always giggle because I see so many women with all their wigs, squeezes, and wigs, stuff like that. And I don't think leaves, wigs, whatever, I don't think they're wrong. I don't think they're, they're anything, right? However, what I would like to say is black women have this obsession with wearing everything else other than their hair.

Now, keep in mind, I am speaking in full hypocrisy, oh, call out my own hypocrisy. But for those of you who are familiar with my channel, you see that I also wear my hair all the time. My regular real hair. I, I'm not caught up, you know, in the whole edge thing where I have to slick my edges down. I mean, doesn't mean I won't, doesn't mean I never, it's just not a thing for me because this is how my hair grows. So I'm not sure if you guys can see these are my edges.

This, this is, it is what it is. Sometimes they curl up, sometimes they're like, throwy it. Look. So my thing is, this is what it is. Well, mine is this. I wear my hair in all kinds of styles, twist styles, Afro sometimes I'll halfway straight in it, but I'm not really all like great at it 'cause my hair is hairy. But it makes me think about the black women who are constantly in this. So-called protective hairstyle.

Why are we constantly protecting our hair? Think about what I'm asking. I know this is gonna say like, oh, because I don't want it to be damaged. Well, they're stop damaging your hair, right? There's, there's lawyers to this conversation. Why do we feel we have to protect our hair unless we're doing something to our hair that could be damaging? Then that lets me know. Then maybe you should stop damaging your hair so you don't have to always protect it. If you are protecting your hair for years, then when do you wear your hair out?

It's always protected from what are you preserving it for then if you're not gonna wear it out anyway, just don't say it's a protective hairstyle. Just say, I don't like my hair. Just shave it all off and then wear, just keep wearing the wigs and stuff, right? What are you protecting it from? If you, I mean, it's like, for what? You're never gonna wear it out. You're never gonna wear your hair. You're never gonna do anything with your hair. Most of us, if we're being honest, don't even like our hair. We're still caught up on these beauty standards that we can't really live up to. So we spend an extraordinary amount of money on protecting the hair that we don't like and will never wear.

I'm, I'm just calling it think a thing. The protective hairstyle, response. I think it's, it's, it's, it's a lie. We wear these, these weave and wigs and brace and stuff like that because we don't want to wear our hair out. Now I will wear my hair out. Now I sound like a full on pick me. I don't care because I've just come to the conclusion like, that's just how my hair grow out of my head. It is what it is. It is what it is. Don't ask me to spend an extraordinary amount of time doing all the weird baby hair that come all the way down to your eyebrows.

I don't understand that trend, but, you know, it's a young girl thing and I'm, I'll be glad when it goes away. But like, I'm not going outta my way to make sure that my hair is super slicked down every single day. I'm not doing it. Doesn't mean I won't do it on occasion, but generally speaking, I don't go out of my way to slick down edges. But that's why I have edges. I have a whole lot of them, right? Because I'm not caught up. I'm like, that's how my hair grows. Why can't my hair just be what it's gonna be?

It is what it is. But see, I look at so many of these women getting acting like, yeah, I'm wearing a protective hairstyle for what? And then they go get these bust downs. I could see if you were wearing a protective hairstyle that mimicked your hair, but they're full of it. They're not even trying to look like who they are. And now let's talk about the bus down for a second. I don't think there's anything wrong with, with wearing a bus down wig or anything like that because black hair is, is highly versatile, right?

So in, even in your natural hair, you can wear your hair like bone, straight, wavy, whatever. We can do all kinds of things to manipulate our hair. But the point I'm making is the women who say these things, they wear these weaves and wigs, And, they come up with all of these, oh, I do this to protect my hair. Some people just say, 'cause I don't wanna do my hair. But they'll spend an extraordinary amount of time doing their fake hair. They buy, they, they will spend so much money on the fake hair and we'll spend it on the real hair.

I just thought that was so interesting. But we we're going through this whole, we're protecting our hair. And I'm like, stop lying. Now let's get back into my hypocrisy. A lot of times I'll wear my hair braided because I, I don't wanna do my hair, just look. Can we be honest? I don't wanna do it. It's a lot of work. I don't, it's it's just, it's just out there. It's just a lot. And I don't wanna put chemicals. Maybe I should put some chemicals and I should go back to like a perm.

I haven't had a perm and or a relaxer in so long. Oh my goodness, that would mess up everybody. Like I can't believe she, but, but seriously, like the hair is just like a lot sometimes, right? So sometimes I will wear it braided. The only reason why I'm braided right now is because honestly, I was, we, we had about we going to this weekend. And since we're experiencing 40 days and 40 nights of rain here, I was like, I cannot deal with this moisture right now.

It it, it is a lot. So I did choose, I opted to do this with my hair. But with that being said, I had planned on doing something else. I wanted to actually get my hair done. I hadn't had it done in a while, but I was like, it's not gonna survive. And we're still suffering long suffering from all this rain. Anyway, where I'm going with this, and then I'll, I'll get off of my little soap soapbox, is we need to stop lying.

Most of y'all out there in these streets are not wearing these leaves and wigs because you're protecting your hair. Because from what I understand, you're never wearing your hair. So what are you protecting it from? Protecting it from, what are you saying? You're putting too much heat or stuff in your hair, but then, then that's the case. Then maybe you should consider alternative hairstyles for your hair styles that don't require you to damage your hair all the time. Maybe you work on yourself to figure out what aesthetic do I want for myself?

I'm not saying you have to be natural, but I want to be clear. I, 'cause I don't always think that you have to have your hair in this burg's state. I mean, I feel like if you wanna wear your hair in a relaxer or you wanna wear it like, like you think, was it straight naturals, whatever, I think that's acceptable and fine too because it's your hair. You do what you want. There's nothing wrong with that. What I am saying is we, we, we claim to have all these, so-called Protective hairstyles, and I'm like, what are you protecting your hair from? Like, why are you protecting it if you're never wearing it out for what, what are you protecting it from?

It's like you say you're protecting your hair, but you never wear your hair. So then it becomes like, okay, well you're not really protecting your hair. You're not, you are hiding your hair. That's what you're doing, you want to do, and you want an aesthetic that's not going to match what it is for your hair. If it's just your hair. That's how I see it. Now. I have been wrong before. I'll be wrong again. But like I said, I'm practically person in every way I could.

There's no wrong. Like why can, am I contradicting myself? But no, I'm just, I'm just calling through and seeing it now. It doesn't really make me better to go walk around looking like, who shot John, right? So I should probably do better, right? but I'm, I'm going through it I, think I'm going through the change. I'm tired. I got 500 kids. So I just, the hair just does what it wants to do. It's just, hey, it's just doing what it wants to do. But all jokes aside, the protective hairstyle, narrative I think most of us are being dishonest.

We are not protecting hair. Like I can see if you were in like the modeling industry or entertainment industry and stuff like that, like, I get it, like when you're like really, really working or busy or whatever, I understand when you start doing, you, you, you do things to protect your hair because of all the manipulations and stuff like that. But when you're not working or whatever, are you letting your hair rest? Are you letting it be in this normal natural state? Now with that being said, I don't know. I, I, I know that mo many people may struggle with their hair and hair texture, how it goes out of their head, regardless of what they say, they say behavior is a language, right?

Behavior is a language. So I look at what you do, not necessarily what you're saying. If you're constantly doing something else, I'm like, okay, you don't want to wear your hair, you don't like your hair, you don't like manipulating your hair. All these other things. So it's kinda like, why have it? What are you preserving and protecting your hair for if you're not going to wear your hair? Now with that being said, maybe I should do more Protective hairstyles. I just don't like all that crap in my head.

I barely like having braids in my hair. I like the ease of comfort of braids, of course. But usually after a while I'm like, I need this out. I just like to let my my scalp scalp. Like I just, that's just where I'm at with it. And let me say for the record, if I have to wear weaves and wigs and stuff like that, I will most certainly do. So, but with I, I don't, I guess I don't have to. And I'm also content outside of me and my full on hypocrisy here. I am also content to the the situation.

Situation, right? It's kind of like I'm looking at myself in this camera right now and I'm looking at the dark circles under my eyes and I probably can use some under eye concealer, maybe foundation or something. But I also like being relatively fresh faced too. Like it is what it is.

It doesn't mean I won't ever use this stuff, but I'm just, I have grown into a space where I am comfortable with how I'm showing up in the world. I think the way I show up in the world is showing that yes, I think I I my skin is good skin, but I'm also 48, right? So I don't think I look bad for 48 at all. And, and matter of fact, like I feel like it's a blessing to be able to say I'm 48 and show up the way I show up.

But I, I mean, I also take care of my skin. My skin is nice and soft. I take care of my skin. But the point is, you see these under, I, I've always had this since I was a child. I can show you pictures of me m like I look like somebody punched me in the eye. But it is what it is, right? It is what it is. So I think for me is maybe I have just had the luxury of being older and comfortable. I don't need to say I'm wearing a protective hairstyle, like I'm protecting my hair. If they say, why is your hair braided?

I'm like, because it's raining outside and I'm tired of doing my hair and I don't wanna do it anymore. That's it. I didn't even do it because it was a protective hairstyle. I did it because I was tired and I needed a hairstyle. I didn't have to do it over the weekend and it would last. And so now we're gonna do this for a few weeks. That's why I wore it, not because I was protecting my hair. all right, so I'm gonna move on onto something else. I wanna talk about Shannon Sharpe for a second. Shannon Sharpe came out or said something I think he put out a tweet or something.

I always catch everything like a day later dollar short, right? About he's no longer gonna be responding to negativity and all this other stuff. And let me just say this about Shannon Sharpe Shannon Sharpe seems to be caught up in a lot of mess lately, right? Like it's always something with him. He seems to be very anti-black woman for sure. I noticed that. He seems to be doing a whole lot of yelling, especially in terms of like defending Kaitlyn Clark, which is so weird because let me just, okay, lemme take a sidebar for a second.

What is so sad about the Kaitlyn Clark situation is you really just want to appreciate how good of a player she is. But it's all the other stuff that's surround her where her, her psycho fans, that it makes her very polarizing. Not her per se, but it is just like everything surrounding her. So everything that's done is always seen with the racial lines, right? And, and if we're honest, a lot, almost everything is very racial at this point. But the way that he's and Steven A. Smith and everything like that, the way they go so hard for her And, they don't go hard for any other woman, especially the ones that look like me.

It makes it hard to continue to like them. Now I wanna talk about Shannon Sharpe and him saying that he's no longer going to be responding to negativity. I'm like, but you are the negativity. You are creating the negativity. You're, you're, you're talking bad about people. You're attacking black women in their hair choices and stuff like that. You're doing all these things. And what I have come to notice is that Shannon Sharpe has changed, and I still like Shannon, but he's starting to push me away.

Let me tell you something. Watching this, this meteoric rise, right? Watching him rise and, and, and into he is a star. He is charismatic. I mean, he tells like runaway slave, don't get me wrong, but like he's charismatic and he has a, a, a beautiful mind in terms of analyzing sport, right? But as we watch him rise and he's got his club shehe and he's getting these opportunities on these sports networks and stuff like that, the, the, the change in Shannon Sharpe is less likable now as a person in entertainment and media and such, he should be changing, right?

But he's not becoming the person, He's becoming something other than the person that we we loved about him. And so when you're trying to change who you are or you're changing your brand or whatever, sometimes you're gonna lose people. And that change, right? To bring on that new fan base. But he's getting meaner. He's becoming a carbon copy of Stephen A. Smith, the fun-loving person that we grew to, to, to like, and to love and to giggle with.

And that person is going away and he, he's, he's taking pleasure and dunking on black women too. And so what I am seeing is on his rise, the way it's not only is he stepping on the people who helped elevate and prop him up, it's, it's, it's the way he's casting aside these people now that he's, he, not that he's consciously doing it, maybe he is, but on the way, on his rise up, right?

I feel like I don't think he's being careful in the way in how he is showing up in this world. Now he is allowed to do whatever he wants, but the person that he was when we were all supporting this man and helping to elevate this man because he was likable and he was funny, and you felt like you can bring him into your home.

Now, I'm just saying from my perspective as a black woman, it's like I would have to be cautious. Like what? I want someone who thinks it's okay to say these harmful things in my home. I want you to think about that for a second because now his rhetoric is becoming mean. It's like this. He's above it all now, right? I'm like, well, you can't talk about how you're not gonna respond to negativity when you are creating a lot of this surrounding, everything around around you right now is it's becoming a spectacle.

You are part of this. You're creating this to watch you. It's like you, I'm like, why are you getting aggressive with women? And so well, because that was the first one that came to my mind was now all of a sudden he wants to punt on all the negativity. He wants to punt On her.

Excuse me. He wants to punt on these hard conversations. He wants to kick the can down the road, something he doesn't want to be bothered because it's getting hard. Because what happens is you'll, you'll be held accountable. So everyone is starting to pull up some of these old tweets about he continues to like, he's just getting nastier and nastier. And what I would say is not that he's listening to me, is I would caution Shannon, because it reminds me of the Kanye situation when Kanye was, was flying high and he was disparaging black women and he talking back about black people and everything else, right?

He was doing great until he passed off the right one. And you know what they did? They said, dear Kanye, we don't even want your money here at JP Morgan and Chase. We don't even want your money in our banking.

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